First off, this week we introduced the Maternally Yours
“Books over Brunch” meeting which we will now be holding every other month at
Station 400. Our first selection is Into these Hands: Wisdom from Midwives,
and our first meeting will be December 2nd at 10am.
It is important to start, first off, by noting that the
contents of tonight’s show may be particularly difficult for some listeners.
The subject of tonight’s show deal with pregnancy and infant loss, and ways in
which loved ones and the community can work to support someone who has been
through this very trying experience. We discussed the stages of grieving that
someone mourning a loss of pregnancy or an infant might experience, and the
ways in which women have to work in order to achieve a “new normal” after such
a loss.
Cohostess Cheryl talked to us about her own experiences with
pregnancy loss and as a pregnancy loss doula. She talked about the ways in
which her own loses affected her future pregnancy, and how she has witnessed
these losses having an effect on other women as well. In particular, she
highlighted the fear and anxiety that many women may feel, as well as a lack of
attachment and fear of bonding to one’s pregnancy that is also common. In
particular, Cheryl talked about her experiences have highlighted a need for
continued support of individuals grieving a pregnancy or infant loss, and the
ways in which individuals must be free to grieve on their own terms, in their
own way, and for their own amount of time.
Our next guest was Arielle Carrillo. Arielle shared her own
experience with third trimester loss of her daughter. Arielle walked us through
her truly impactful experience, from hospital care, to dealing with the after
effects of her loss. She shared the ways
in which her son helped get her through the difficult time, and how her
friends, family and community encouraged her healing process. In particular,
she discussed the need for loved ones to reach out directly to someone who has
gone through this experience, helping them to take care of everyday things like
food and cleaning which they may not be focused on or able to do because of
what they are going through. Arielle also noted that you cannot have a
stillbirth at home in Florida, however Christina Holmes of Birthways Family
Birth Center noted that let us know that a stillbirth can be performed at home
with a Licensed Midwife in the home setting now, provided that legal and
medical arrangements are made in advanced.
Our final guest was Tamara Taitt of The Gathering Place Maternity Center
in Miami, Florida. She talked to us about the usefulness of support groups for
some individuals when grieving pregnancy and
infant loss. She also talked to us about the ways in which a support
group could be started in our own area, specifically through Share. On top of stressing the
helpfulness of support groups, Tamara also talked about the ways in which main
supports within the family unit needs to be emotionally and physically present,
as well as acknowledging that while you can’t know what they are going through,
you can be there for them.
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